RE: RE:D*' consequences

You are violating the following orders of Permanent Injunctions as to
Persons described in pages 36 and 37 of our divorce decree:

        2. Communicating in person, by telephone, or in writing with
H* CHOI LYNCH, except arranging visitation or notifying H*
CHOI LYNCH of circumstances affecting the best interest of the child.

        4. Interfering in any way with the Managing Conservator's
possession of the child or taking or retaining possession of the child,
directly or in concert with other persons, except as permitted by order
of the Court.

--H*
        

-----Original Message-----
From: tom lynch [mailto:tom.lynch@somedomain]
Sent: Monday, August 16, 2004 9:21 PM
To: H* Lynch
Subject: RE: RE:D*' consequences

I just witnessed something that wants to make me puke ...

When you arrived at school, D* locked himself under a table in
mortal fear and refused to come out. You threatend consequences. You
pulled on his arm while pushing against both your legs as though trying
to lose a piece of cloth caught under some funiture, but he did not lose
his grip. You told him that his dad was a bad influence. You said that
I was dangerous and sneaky. He didn't want to go home with you. To
convince him to let go of the table legs you asked him if he would
rather go home with his dad. He said yes. You asked him if he would
like to live with his Dad. He said yes and let go. Then you started
hauling him off anyway. You told him that I was affecting his mind and
ignored the promises you had just made. Are you taking him home for
more "consequences"?

On Mon, 2004-08-16 at 09:56, H* Lynch wrote:
> No video, no TV, no Cable.
>
> I still appreciate if you can tell me what you are doing to correct
his
> behavior. Thanks.
>
> --H*
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: tom lynch [mailto:tom.lynch@somedomain]
> Sent: Friday, August 13, 2004 7:09 PM
> To: H* Lynch
> Subject: Re: RE:D*' consequences
>
> So, if I understand you, then currently he has no videos, but he has
> television and cable.
>
>
> On Fri, 2004-08-13 at 16:56, H* Lynch wrote:
> > Tom,
> >
> > You are right about the importance of communication between us, and
I
> guess both of us need to work on that part.
> >
> > The foundation that I am laying for the consequence is that first I
> use reward system. D* will get points when he behaves well and
> lose points when he misbehaves. If he gets 20 points, he can choose to
> buy his favorite toy up to $10.00 or save it for later.
> >
> > When he needs serious correction of his behavior such as hitting or
> throwing objects, he will lose his privilege. His privilege includes
> watching video/kid's TV program, playing computer games, visiting
> amusement parks, or something which he enjoys very much for fun. If he
> still does not correct his behavior with this consequence, he can not
> invite his friend to play for the weekend ("being grounded").
> >
> > Recently, I observed that D* took out his anger in negative
way.
> "Counting down to 10" used to work for him to calm down his anger, but
> he said it is not working anymore. Once in a while, D* was
talking
> about being spanked for his bad behavior at your house. I really think
> giving physical consequences build up hidden anger inside of him.
> >
> > This is what I have been doing for D*' behavior correction. I
> would really appreciate if you could tell me about what you've been
> doing on your side. This way we can improve D*' behavior for his
> best interest.
> >
> > --H*
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: tom lynch [mailto:tom.lynch@somedomain]
> > Sent: Friday, August 13, 2004 11:39 AM
> > To: H* Lynch
> > Subject: RE: D*' consequences
> >
> >
> > H*, in order to be able to communicate with my son, I need to
> have
> > some idea of what the foundation is that you are laying. Last night
> you
> > asked D* about what happens at my place. This puts him in
the
> > middle and is bad for him.
> >
> > There is no replacement for communication between us. Are you
> willing
> > to take the role of a joint managing conservator and open up
> > communications? Or are these hostilities going to continue on?
> >
> > Now, please, give me on idea of what is going on with D* on
your
> > side, so that I may provide for his needs on my side.
> >
> > D* was noticably concerned about these consequences, what are
> > they? You mentioned no videos. Does this mean no television also?
> >
> >
> > On Fri, 2004-08-13 at 10:34, H* Lynch wrote:
> > > Tom,
> > >
> > > As long as there is no spanking involved (hypocrite uses it to
teach
> > > kids non-violence), neither of us should not meddle other parent's
> > > discipline method. I hope you understand this and please do not
use
> > > spanking for your own discipline method.
> > >
> > > Thanks for your future cooperation.
> > >
> > > --H*
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > -----Original Message-----
> > > From: tom lynch [mailto:tom.lynch@somedomain]
> > > Sent: Friday, August 13, 2004 10:09 AM
> > > To: H* Lynch
> > > Subject: D*' consequences
> > >
> > > When you say you have taken his videos away, does that include
> > > television in general, or is it just the videos?
> > >
> > >
> > >
> >
>
Received on Tue Aug 17 09:35:17 2004